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| ‘10,000 B.C.’ may just lead to extinction (D+) | ||||||||||||||||||||||
| By Craig Outhier, Get Out | ||||||||||||||||||||||
| March 6, 2008 | ||||||||||||||||||||||
And therein lies the problem with Emmerich’s dopey prehistoric adventure flick — it lacks the rawness and authentic spirit of, say, Mel Gibson’s underrated “Apocalypto,” while simultaneously laying an egg as giddy popcorn escapism. Even Emmerich’s global warming manifesto “The Day After Tomorrow” was more fun. Taking a cue from “Apocalypto,” the German-born Emmerich shot the movie without stars, presumably to enhance the overall “otherness” of it. But what’s the point, when your unknown leading man and woman look like a pair of reggae-loving gym rats? D’Leh (Steven Strait, buff) loves Evolet (Camilla Belle, beautiful), but when their primitive tribe — isolated and half-starved in the waning days of the Ice Age — is attacked by slave-trading marauders, the affair is indefinitely put on hold. Like a blue-eyed trophy, Evolet is kidnapped and marched to ancient Egypt to help build pyramids. Naturally, D’Leh — a skilled but untested young hunter with father issues, a la any Tom Cruise role from 1986 to 1994 — sets off in pursuit. While tracking his beloved over mountains, through rain forests and across parched deserts, he will also realize his destiny (prophesied by the tribe’s gnarled seer-woman) as a prehistoric messiah who will unite the many marginalized communities of the ancient world against the self-styled pharaoh who exploits and brutalizes them. Essentially, D’Leh is a variation of Hollywood’s favorite stock hero: the small-town kid who goes to the big city and knocks ’em dead. Emmerich and co-screenwriter Harald Kloser take the conceit to comically literal extremes; surveying the confederacy of ethnically varied tribes who’ve sworn allegiance to him, D’Leh is like a Stone Age gang leader preparing for prehistory’s biggest rumble. It’s too bad the Greasers and Mods aren’t on hand to make things interesting. Until now, Emmerich has managed to hold the fort as a trash-epic showman; the Spielberg of B-movies. But in this case, even his computer-generated megafauna — including woolly mammoths, saber-toothed tigers and giant killer ostriches — feel like Discovery Channel leftovers. The acting is bad and the special effects are cheap, and so is the weird, let’s-burn-it-down mob subtext. For Emmerich, “10,000 B.C.” is not only out of step; it could be an extinction-level nonevent. REVIEW ‘10,000 B.C.’Cast: Steven Strait, Camilla Belle, Cliff Curtis Behind the scenes: Directed by Roland Emmerich, from a script by Emmerich and Harald Kloser Rated: PG-13 (sequences of intense action and violence), 109 minutes Grade: D+ Contact Craig Outhier by email, or phone (480) 898-5683 |
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